A random chain of events.
I was a distraught new divorcé living in Houston, TX while helplessly counting down the days until I could high tail it out of the sweltering heat. My hopes came true three months later as I was able to leave the surface of the sun for greener pastures, in the seriously tolerable outpost of Charlotte, NC. However, during those miserable 3 months I was all on my lonesome, getting ready to move to another place where I knew no one outside my immediate family (which was more than I had in TX). In being terrified of going out alone I started searching around for acquaintances on social networks, in which I came across 2 people. One that helped me move from the desolation, in which I proceeded to date for 3 years on and off. And the second was someone whom I only talked to once or twice till the wee hours in the morning, but never met or talked to again once I moved. The three year relationship was all encompassing and took my complete and undivided attention, this was a bad thing. I didn’t like who I had become as I was regressing to the maturity and responsibility level of a high-schooler.
Luckily, when that ended and I moved on; I started venturing out of my comfort zone and went out alone to a show. Actually I got stood up by a co-worker. But that lead to metting someone who had similar interests in music and nightlife, with which I proceeded to go on a few dates with… I wasn’t interested but forced myself to lighten up and live a little and as Mr. man later described as doing some community service. I realized that being out no matter how awkward the nights progressed it was better than moping around my house thinking how much of a social reject I was. Thanks to this line of rationalizing I went to a concert to just get out and had a pretty decent time of it, though now looking back my more modest sensibilities would never be caught dead in that minimal amount of clothing publicly… Looking for the damage that would surely be plastered on some promotional site I came across a photo of someone that was all too familiar. Mr. we talked all night and never met… thinking it was such a small world that we ended up at the same place and the same time but never saw each other. I amped up into super stealth detective mode and went gallivanting on the social networking sites in hopes of coming across said conversationalist. Low and behold I got lucky… That and well there are only soo many Eduardo’s in Caucasian Charlotte, NC… So, quick as can be I shot over a message and crossed fingers that I could have another friend in the area. I swore I was not looking for anything other than someone to hang out with. Not a day later I get a response. Less than a week and we finally got to meet. A meeting in which I was pleasantly surprised…
“Hmm… he looks waay better than those pictures… “ My brain quickly shot to judging
“Ok Michelle, don’t go there… we need friends remember…” went my internal pep talk.
A few drinks, some pizza and lots of dancing later, I say the phrase that still haunts me to this day “LEAD, DAMMIT!” Then the progression of nearly getting my arm ripped off as he Lead, dammit. I went home that night and smiled as I went to sleep I had made a friend that liked the things I like, understood where I came from and was not looking to date either… turns out we both turned single about a week apart and had a bad taste because of it. Which turned into hanging out all weekend, then the following. I made an awsome 3 course dinner and we killed 3 whole bottles of wine on a work night (how irresponsible of me, I know). I let him crash in my guest room, as I firmly locked my bedroom door (a girl can never be too careful).. But that was all it took, hook line and sinker, a week later we finalized plans to go to the beach. As friends go we had a blast and came away as us instead of being pigeon holed in the friend zone. We were nervous and waiting for the bait and switch that never came.
One night out of getting our boogie on, in my slightly judgement-addled brain I coughed out those 3 words I swore I would never feel again… and I would surely never say first in the off-chance that my heart expressly ignored my brain. I said it loud enough that Mr. Man’s best friend heard it amidst the chaos of music, dancing and fog machines… It was one of those rare moments of clarity that one only gets in those impaired states where your brain has no filter and you blab out whatever happens to pop into your consciousness.
After weekend getaways, lots of dinners, dancing till the wee hours of the morning, 2 am Pizzas, and family gatherings, we decided to go skiing and tour a nearby mansion.. We had joked about relationships having shelf lives time and time again, and the morning before heading north I told him he was closer to bread than milk but silently sulking and thinking if this relationship was going anywhere. We tour this amazing house and I test out my new camera totally bummed that the conservatory was closed but thinking to take some pictures of the building all covered in snow. As I walked carefully up the steps to avoid twisting a rather clumsy ankle or breaking my balance-challenged neck, I swing around and see him on one knee with a little box in his hand.
And for the first time in my life I think to myself “that better not be a pair of earrings!” I heard the shaking in his voice and realized he didn’t drop something or fall but was down there on purpose, and he asked if I would be his always. I the mother of ruining all surprises was just that surprised, and speechless. This came totally out of the blue, that mythical place with rainbows and dragons, this can’t be real realm of consciousness. But it was and he put the most beautiful (yet slightly ostentatious) ring on my finger. From that moment on we might as well have been on a rocket ship to outer space things moved so fast. We bought a house, moved in together, planned a wedding, went on 2 honeymoons (one pre-wedding and one after) and got hitched. We now have 3 dogs and endless things to do in said house. The money pit. But I found that special one that I can see myself having a family with, Growing old with. Travelling the world with (even if I have to drag him kicking and screaming through the jungle), and share my dreams with. The one who made me forget all others and want no one else.